A MISPLACED BLOG BY A DISPLACED WRITER TYPING IN A CONFINED SPACE THE SIZE OF A MERE UNIVERSE. IF YOU ARE RUNNING AN AD-BLOCKER, YOU'LL MISS A FEW FEATURES LIKE THE FANTASTIC POLL. JUST SAYIN'.

Friday, 14 June 2019

DEMENTIA CARE: LATE BLOG POST.


It’s a week for carers, apparently. I’ve had a raft of letters relating to care sail across the letterbox into my tired hands. One of the letters seemed to be a bill, but it was letting me know that there’d be a maximum level to any care bills that floated in.
   What should I talk about? The endless changes to routine that don’t even resemble changes? I tired of pizza, and replaced pizza with different pizza. Still eating pizza now and again. Different pizza, mind. Better pizza. I make a point of heating meals in the oven. Just to feel that I’m not living that carer lifestyle.
   In the world of caring, instant food is your friend. The microwave is convenient. So is the one-cup kettle that provides hot water in half a minute. Into the packet soup that hot water goes. Yet I make time to slam a pizza in the oven and keep a watchful ear on the smoke alarms.
   Letters come in. I formulate responses. Letters. Telephone calls. There’ll be a text message to deal with. Any old time. Early morning to around 5.00 in the late afternoon, I am a prisoner of routine that isn’t routine at all. And outwith those hours, my time might be my own. Wouldn’t bank on that, though.
   What does it mean to be a carer in a week devoted to carers? Nothing changes. The hinge goes dead on the electric bath chair. I phone a helpline and ask for the number. Stores. Phone call hunting for a phone number. The guy in stores checks the part-list, confirming the make of chair. He can have someone come out in five days.
   I improvise a repair until then. A whole section of the chair has to come off.
   Then it’s on to the next thing. The shopping is delivered. An e-mail tells me everything is on the way. Except the milk. No strawberry milk. Only chocolate. That’s no good. The cared-for binged on chocolate when she was a wee lassie, and went right off it after puking her guts out.
   I knock back the chocolate milk. As soon as the delivery guy leaves, I head to town, to the supermarket, to buy the strawberry milk that I know is there. Of course it is. That’s just my luck. The stuff isn’t there when they pick it and load it onto the van. I stuff it into my big bag, and I buy two new towels.
   My trip into town replenished the cash supply. I cash notes in for low-cost items and make change. The world of being a carer is an electronic world. But the electronic world doesn’t go far into the woods of the cash-only transaction. There are still enough cash jobs floating around to be annoying. My rescue of the strawberry milk carries me past the weedkiller place. I buy weedkiller there. That doesn’t go in my big bag. I carry it.
   Beyond the druggies I go, hoping I don’t have to defend myself against them. My weapons are a large bottle of weedkiller and a massive bag full of strawberry milk bottles. The druggies stop abusing someone who darted around the corner. They go back to investigating the ground. It is of extreme interest to them. They look as if they are going to lie down there and die together alone.
   Just along the way, two near-druggies wonder what the fuck the police are doing walking around there at that time. Policing, I’d guess. The police don’t walk around anywhere at any old time on the off-chance that there’s a welcoming picnic about to burst into action.
   Were the first druggies hurling abuse at the second druggies, before I arrived late to the scene?
   Traffic mayhem costs me a bus by ten seconds. I blame everyone who stood in my way on that long street. It was the traffic mayhem that caused the pedestrian mayhem. I sit on the pavement and wait for another bus. There is no way I can be arsed walking home with heavy bags.
   Can’t even be arsed standing, so I plant my arse on the ground.
   I look back down the street, at floor-level, and take in life from a different perspective. A few people look me up and down, wondering if I am okay. I see a lot of harassed people, trying and failing to deal with awkward parcels and packages. But I gave up that life when I sat down. I’m not harassed or struggling with packages at all. I’ll only struggle when I am waiting to step off the bus.
   Rain hovers, but doesn’t fall. I brace myself on the bus as the machine slows and deposits me at my destination seconds before the rain falls. My trip from the stop to the house is endless. I make it back inside and I dump the bags. Coffee saves me.
   Somewhere along the line, after administering pills and before crashing to bed for the night, I see it is CARERS WEEK. There’s no real reaction to this. For years, being a carer was unofficial. When I spent the last year making it official, everything seemed to get harder and not easier. That was down to progression.
   Progression is slow, though it is still progression. Dementia grows randomer. The troughs are deep in the sea, and threaten to overturn you. And the peaks only serve to show you how far you will fall back into the troughs. I have many amusing moments. Help comes from a multitude of sources.
   You have to switch off, being a carer…though you never switch off, being a carer. It’s a permanent Twilight Zone that had me up at 5.00 in the morning dealing with the disease. Battling the disease. Fighting the randomness. Persuading the cared-for to get back into bed, and then climbing the stairs to find my way back to my own interrupted slumber.
   Sleep is fucking magic.
   CARERS WEEK doesn’t mean anything to me. It’s an event on the internet. In the kitchen, passing through the garden, emptying the bins, making a coffee, repairing the blinds, every item relates to caring and every week is CARERS WEEK.
   All this caring, earlier in the month, delayed my usual blog post. I like to post a blog on or near the 1st of the month. This month, I was busy with the notion of being busy. A million things cluttered my day. And the day after. The day after that. Here I am, finally blogging. And I won’t post this entry until tomorrow.
   I return from fucking brilliant sleep and demolish a coffee before I get to the end of this post. For unknown reasons, the last few paragraphs are double-underlined. I remove the blight. And here we are, almost half the month gone.
   What does it mean, when caring gets to you? It always gets to you, so it’s hard to say. Things go undone for that little bit longer. This blog post. There’s laundry lying on the floor in the kitchen, but that’s by design. When the carer comes in to assist with bathing, I am elsewhere, folding towels. Letting things go undone for a while is part of the routine. I need to have a few towels there to fold when other things are done.
   Just over a year ago, I was the only carer and I was making the transition to being an official one. Then the bathing carers came in for a few days a week. Daily, now. I had so much help, so much assistance, come in over the year. What changed?
   Ups merged with downs and came out roughly even. Doing this alone now would demolish me. There’s so much that I do that would demolish other people. Luckily, I have the patience for it. That’s not enough. This is why coffee was invented.
   But I don’t do enough. That’s the nature of the ailment. At first, you shouldn’t do enough. I was determined to preserve as much independence as possible when the problem farted its way into our lives. And for four years, I fought that slow battle to keep independence going.
   Don’t take all the decisions away, right at the start. That hastens the problem. Year five was about making things official. Bathing assistance was three days a week. Now it’s seven days a week. It’s likely that we’ll go to three days a week for daycare – a trip out to a centre in a minibus and a few hours off for me.
   Twice I’ve been called by telephone, to end the day out early. So…potentially…a few hours off for me. I must struggle. There’s no room for complacency. The smallest random change can throw a concrete block into your plans for that day, week, or even month. It’s important to struggle. Always be ready for the most ludicrous turn of events. And I’ve faced plenty of those plot-twists.
   I’m only here to complain to myself that I should have had this blog post up a fortnight ago. As complaints go, it’s a mild irritation. I’ll live.

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